This is a post by guest author, Christie Lee Rayburn.
She twirls like a ballerina in her new holiday dress and shiny shoes, “Daddy, don’t I look pretty?”
She jumps into his arms of safety after he encourages, “Come on sweetheart – you can do it – daddy will catch you!”
She loves holding her father’s big, strong hand as they walk places and she adores hearing his voice call her his “little princess”.
“She” is every little girl – yearning for her daddy’s love as she grows up.
The power of his attention
Not only would I testify to this in my personal life as a daughter, but I have had a front row seat observing the relationship between our only daughter and her daddy. I’ve been taken aback as I watch the yearning in my daughter’s eyes for her daddy’s belief in her capability. I see the incredible difference her father’s reactions make in her perception of her talents or skills. His words determine the outcome of her self-assurance and potential. One encouraging word literally boosts her confidence to dream and take risks, while one critical word can send her straight to the land of insecurity and doubt.
Fathers affirm competence and set the path for a woman to believe “I don’t have to prove myself. I can do anything.”
It’s amazing how my husband has become her personal mirror to our girl. The truth is that so much of her self-image is reflected in the way her father sees her, the way he interacts with her, and the way he talks about her to others. When he compliments her and assures her of her beauty, she feels like the most lovely young lady in the land. However, a simple throw-away comment or too much teasing can confirm her inner thoughts of ugliness; ugliness that no amount of make-up can cover. Most dads don’t realize the power they hold in establishing their daughter’s self-worth.
Fathers set the stage for future relationships
Fathers are very important role models for their daughters, especially in the puberty and teen years. A father is the first male that a girl comes to intimately know. He sets the stage for his daughter’s future interpersonal interactions; especially with men.
Just the other day our daughter declared to her dad “you ruined me!”
My husband reacted, “What? That sounds horrible! What on earth do you mean that I ruined you?” She went on to explain when it came to dating and marriage, he set the character bar very high. She admires that her dad loves God so openly and has such a giving heart. She respects that he is a strong man with a tender heart. But, mostly, she never doubts that he loves his wife completely, creatively, and faithfully. She has watched it all firsthand. How could she settle for anything less in a young man?
So, from a mother’s perspective, let me encourage every daddy out there to invest big in his little girl’s life.
Be deliberate dads
Support your daughters interests and ask questions about what she is involved in. Build her up every chance you get. Be there for her games or performances. There is no substitute for your presence.
Compliment your girl. Hug her. Tell her how much you love her and how beautiful she is a million times while she grows up. Realize the powerful mirror you are in her life.
Go ahead and “ruin her” and set the bar high by the way you treat your wife. Make your daughter feel like you want to be close to her. Take her on a date. Show her how she should be treated.
Dads, no one replaces the unique spot you hold in your daughter’s heart.
Every little girl and every big girl wants her daddy’s love.
Share with us how your dad made you feel loved or how your husband shows special love to your daughter.
P.S. – Send this to a dad of a daughter.
CHRISTIE LEE RAYBURN
Mirror Mirror: Confetti Café.